Sin Nombre (2009), Cary Joji Fukunaga, A-

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Monday, November 16th, 2009

sin_nombre.JPG

A frightening fantasy film about a horrible, lawless, far off land called Mexico.

What? It’s real. Oy vey!

It’s movies like this that will guilt me into giving up my seat to every tired looking immigrant I see on the subway.

Northlanders 17-20

Jordan | Cram it in Your Ear | Sunday, November 15th, 2009

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Northlanders 17 is one of my favorite one-shot comics of all time. It’s actually the one that got me all into Northlanders in the first place.

It has no plot – simply a description of two Vikings in the middle of an honor fight to the death. The detailed narration that comes along with it is a perfect snapshot of the Viking culture that is at the heart elsewhere in Brian Wood’s stories. It is simple and perfect and Vasilis Lolos’ artwork is absolutely mesmerizing in its subtlety.

Anyone who thinks comics can’t be high art needs to take a look at this. (You can see much of it here if you don’t believe me.)

18-19 tells the story of a trio of women who must step up and defend themselves against some horrible Christians and 20 brings back our favorite Sven of Orkney, now hidden up in the Faroe Islands, letting his legend grow so strong some knuckleheads dare to try and kill him for glory.

Issue 21 begins an 8-issue arc. More on that as it completes.

Fringe Comics 1-6

Jordan | Cram it in Your Ear | Sunday, November 15th, 2009

300px-FringeComic01-00

I am just as surprised as you are to learn that Fringe comics are good.

I would say that this 6 issue arc is actually more fun than many of the episodes.

It is, at heart, a prequel, with a young Walter Bishop meeting and working with a young William Bell. (As this was all done before the casting coup, the Comics’ Bell looks nothing like Leonard Nimoy – nor is he the appropriate age, but that’s okay.)

You get to watch Bish & Belly do all sorts of wacky stuff in their Harvard lab – like go back in time to fight Hitler!!!

Each issue also comes with a smaller, tag story that is just a little bit of “Pattern” spookiness.

Issue 6 is the only one set “now” and its last panel is Agent Dunham knocking on Bishop’s hospital door. Fun stuff.

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1937), David Hand et al, A

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Sunday, November 15th, 2009

SnowWhite3

It really holds up.

And is incredibly offensive to women, Dwarfs, woodland animals. . .you name it!

Caprica (2009), Jeremy Reiner, C+

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Sunday, November 15th, 2009

caprica2
Meh.

No new ideas. The holodeck is not a new idea. Nor is downloaded, post-human immortality. And the CGI looks pretty shoddy.

I hope the series improves on the pilot DVD.

Deep Impact (1998), Mimi Leder, B-

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Saturday, November 14th, 2009

deepimpact

In the build-up to 2012 I could no longer live with myself knowing I’d never seen Deep Impact.

It isn’t bad – well, yeah, I guess it is a little bad – but it gets points for trying.

The problem, and I believe filmmakers (other than Emmerich) are starting to realize this, is that the cast of a thousand formula can never be taken seriously. Deep Impact tries to be serious, and works up until the Astronauts show up. Then it is a total mess. Kerry Douglas Dye would never allow a screenplay so messy to leave his apartment.

2012 (2009), Roland Emmerich, C-

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Saturday, November 14th, 2009

Tell No One (2008), Guillaume Canet, C

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Monday, November 9th, 2009

tell_no_one_2006

Everyone loves this movie but me.

Imagine The Big Sleep but ten times more confusing but one tenth as charming.

Plot, plot, plot gets shoved in your face – then everything gets explained, but then re-explained for real. The end.

And no Humphrey Bogart. In fact, no characters at all to really care about – just a racing, baffling plot. Okay, a cute dog.

Maybe when the American producers remake it (as is supposedly happening) they’ll whip it into some shape. As it stands, it is confusing, fast and French enough to trick people into thinking it is art. In fact, it makes no sense.

Meteor (1979), Ronald Neame, C-

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Monday, November 9th, 2009

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Even by the standards of bad, cast of a thousand stars disaster pics this is a joke.

Odd is that Neame made so many great films – even a descent cast of a thousand stars disaster pic! (Juggernaut.)

Well, Henry Fonda, Martin Landau, Natalie Wood, Sean Connery, Karl Malden and others face a big rock. Then they all swim in chocolate milk. The Swarm kicks its ass.

Pixar Short Films Collection Vol. 1 (2007), John Lassiter et. al., B+

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Sunday, November 8th, 2009

forthebirds

The early shorts are great for a historical perspective but, alas, they are a bit of a bore.

Things don’t get cookin’ til 1989’s Knick Knack (the one with the SnoGlobe.)

Even though I’ve never seen Cars, I found myself greatly enjoying the Cars-short Mater and the Ghost Light, but that may have just been because it was 1 AM and I was getting giddy.

Taken and (see above) For The Birds kick a whole lot of ass, too.

Look forward to Vol II – the cloud short from Up is pretty fantastic.

The Assassination of Jesse James By The Coward Robert Ford (2007), Andrew Dominik, A

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Sunday, November 8th, 2009

assassination

In 2007 I named this my number 1 film – over Sunshine, There Will Be Blood and No Country For Old Men.

I’m not 100% I would make that statement again, but I still think it is one hell of a picture.

It is beautiful, it is complex, the performances are fantastic and the dialogue hums. It definitely looses something on DVD, even if you have a super HD television.

There are rumblings out there of this becoming the cult success it deserves – in a few more years, I imagine, it will be recognized as a masterpiece.

X-Men: Magneto Testament

Jordan | Cram it in Your Ear | Sunday, November 8th, 2009

magneto_testament_1

Lots here depends on your point of view.

For an X-Men comic, this is a miraculous work. For Holocaust fiction (even Holocaust fiction in comic form) it is a trifle.

I was a little nervous that we’d somehow see young Magnus bending crematorium doors open with his mind, but Greg Pak is smarter than that. We see very little mutant power in the young German Jew condemned to Sonderkommando work in Auschwitz. I just hope the eventual 20th Century Fox film has the good sense to keep it that way (doubtful.)

Northlanders: The Cross and the Hammer

Jordan | Cram it in Your Ear | Sunday, November 8th, 2009

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The third arc of Brian Wood’s Northlanders takes the action to Ireland, where a one man resistance force causes agita for the invasion force. Some 11th Century CSI work is either awesome or far-fetched, depending on your point of view.

While I still really dig these amoral Viking stories, I prefer the artwork in the earlier comics to what is collected here. It looks too Dick Tracy for my taste. Still worth your time, though. Right now, other than Trek comics, these are the only current comics I currently care about.

Battlestar Galactica: The Plan (2009), Edward James Olmos, B

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Sunday, November 8th, 2009

bikx8k

Far be it from me to look a gift horse in the mouth, but even the most dedicated BSG fans will have to admit this is an altogether unnecessary coda to a show that is, we must face facts, done done done.

Ostensibly an opportunity to see the whole series from “another point of view,” but, really, that isn’t the case. Blame that on the fact that the show was well written enough to begin with.

A hodge-podge of classic clips and new material – this is 100% for fans only and will be completely baffling to someone coming to it fresh.

I enjoyed it, I agree, but if I paid for this I’d feel a little used. It’s like buying a new greatest hits CD for one new track.

The Men Who Stare At Goats (2009), Grant Heslov, C-

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Friday, November 6th, 2009

For more, go here.

The Box (2009), Richard Kelly, B+

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Friday, November 6th, 2009

For more, go here.

Futurama: Into The Wild Green Yonder (2009), Peter Avanzido, B+

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Thursday, November 5th, 2009

1

Better than Bender’s Game but not as good as Bender’s Big Score or The Beast With A Billion Backs.

I love, love, love Futurama, but if it ended here, well, that might be a good place for it. I question if bringing the band back together as the rumors have it right now is a good idea.

I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream

Jordan | Cram it in Your Ear | Thursday, November 5th, 2009

i-have-no-mouth

One of the more famous collections of “psychedelic” science fiction. From a man, of course, who never touched psychedelics.

The titular story is fantastic, a few others are interesting. And others still are completely forgettable. Harlan Ellison is terse, sometimes, to his own detriment. These are short short stories – oftentimes just enough to get some kooky idea across and then move on.

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