If this doesn’t lead you to a bottle of Maalox, I don’t know what does. Ann and I got a parking ticket this weekend. The sign was extremely confusing and there were a lot of other cars parked there (they all got tickets too, thank God.) I can deal with a ticket; if I had a Talmudic scholar with me I’d’ve been able to divine we were in violation when we parked — fine, mea culpa, I guess. But here’s the thing: The ticket doesn’t say how much we owe. The guy fucked up. You *can* contest a ticket with any info missing. . . like what violation we actually committed (this ticket doesn’t say), but in order to do this online you have to fill out a form. The form won’t be accepted unless you have some basic info — like what’s the violation!!!! So I just spent 15 minutes on hold to ask someone — but she couldn’t look up the violation in the system because it was too new! She says to call back in 2 1/2 to 3 weeks — which is awfully close to 30 days. 30 days scares me because that’s when the ticket gets a $10 surcharge for being late. I’m sorry, but is this Soviet Russia? Did we lose the cold war? For now I’ll wait 2 1/2 weeks, but if the info is not readily available I will raise holy hell. Stay tuned.