Jordan Hoffman Dot Com

Goober, sleeping.

Goober, kinda half awake. Maybe he thirsts for seltzer.

Goober H. Cat, awake and fully ready to annoy and pester you. He’s a real jerk.

Lots of photos have been taken, few have been shared.

From Jake’s birthday party:

Amanda says, “Hey, what’s with you?”

Amanda thinks Ann is loopy.

My Aunt Joan’s favorite words begin with an “F” and end with an “UCK.”

Jake in a parachute.

UPDATE: This actually isn’t Jake, but one of his little friends. Who can see with such a blurry lens?

I’m thinking of doing something stupid.

I’ve done something stupid.

I’m paying the price.

An offscreen hand to help me out.

I cook breakfast once in a while.

The funniest named public housing development.

A pigeon.

Matt Levy and Goober.

Me and Ely (nee Chairman Meow.)

Jurgen makes a face.

Mr. & Mrs. Johnson-Rozger (on her birthday.)

Taken the same night (and notice how Emma’s head [Emma is the one on the right] strangely echoes Mrs. J-R’s!)

Dumplings and Sandwiches in the Flushing Underworld:

The Levy’s and I have made a few trips to this hidden mall in Flushing (Main St. & 41st) and each time it is a major event.

Here is Mark ordering up. Note how the decor really looks like some dude’s apartment in Queens.

Matt and I wait in anticipation.

The ingredients for the mystery sandwiches.

Yum.

Dude’s making some kinda spicy sweet noodles that kinda taste like Waffle Crisp cereal.

Lamb sandwiches. Sooooo good.

Outta control dumplings.

Stinky Fried Tofu. It doesn’t sound good, it doesn’t taste good. But I am glad I tried it once.

It’s my world!!!

It’s my head!!!

I love the Flushing scene, but my heart belongs to Wo Hop.

On St. Patrick’s Day (or, actually, a few days later) Ann made Irish Food. Behold!

The Coleman’s Double-Strength Mustard is INTENSE. Even I had to cry uncle.

Goober is in a corner.

Goober is sporting much bling.

Without fail, if we put on one of the 10-part BBC Life of Birds DVDs, Goober will wind up planted in front of the tube. It is the only, only, only time he’ll sit in front of the TV like this. Highly entertaining

This is the over-Goober’s-shoulder shot.

Some recent shots:

The house we live in in Queens is ringed with peach trees. They are now in full bloom and they are delicious. Our landlady gave us a huge sack of them and tells us she is “making marmalat!” They serve both sides of the pesticide argument well. Never has a peach tasted juicier, but Ann had a worm in one of hers.

I came home late the other night and found a man stalking on the staircase. He looked at me glumly, apologized, then zipped away on his bike. He had his arms full of peaches. I told this to my landlord when I saw him the next day. He said, “Is good — let them take!”

Obviously, everyone in this shot needs that next yellow cup of Jagermeister.

Goober on his way to Aunt Barbie’s on East 74th St.

George & Sibby at Federici’s on Main St. Note George is wearing a Preservation Hall T-shirt.

The Great Kerry Douglas Dye.

Me and Banana.

Me and Evan.

Michelle, Che & Raoul. If you listen closely, you can almost hear Raoul going “Nuh-uh!!!”

Ann’s co-worker Rocco.

Rocco is a working cat, keeping the shop free of any critters.

But he doesn’t seem to be working very hard right now.

If you are sitting on our couch and Goober climbs up and sits behind you, you’ve got Cat Hat.

Goober owns the couch.

Ann hears something.

Ann and Goober spend an evening in with some light reading.

What I like is that you can clearly see here how it is Goober demanding when the pages be turned.

Off in the wild wilderness of Monmouth County, Ann spies a Caterpillar.

The Caterpillar climbs a tree.

Here is the ‘pillar on an arm.

Close up of Mr. ‘pillar.

Click here to see REALLY close.

Me in the wilderness. 5 minutes in nature and I need 10 mg of Lortadine and a hit of Albuterol.

Sunset on the Hoffman family compound.

Nephew Jake plays a memory game.

It’s like Husker Du but, like, nicer.

I don’t think I’ve ever had a haircut as cool as Jake’s at age 3. What’s up with that?

Jake and Grampa Hoffman thoroughly engrossed in “Monster’s Inc.”

Jake, Grampa & Uncle Jordan.

My collection of New York City (mostly) reference books. A shelf of tax write-offs!

Goober demands your undivided attention.

If you talk to me on the phone, there is a better than fair chance this is the scene that’s happening on the other side.

Goober in Hard Light:

Goober At His Wash Station:

Goober Preparing For Bed:

Just because I haven’t put up any pictures of Goober lately doesn’t mean I haven’t taken them!

Sometimes, on a day like yesterday, when it is too stinkin’ hot to leave the house and our aquatic plans get dashed at the last minute, Ann & I will pop in the BBC documentary “Life of Birds” and watch one of the ten sixty minute segments. It is hard to pay attention to the screen, though, because it is far to much fun watching Goober watch the TV. He’ll sit close, face front to the screen, following whichever soaring ornithological creature with his eyes. When a chirp is heard from the stereo speakers his ears will prick up. And he doesn’t budge.

When will the Life of Domestic Housecats DVD come out?

Here we see a sleeping Goober get assaulted by a wave of strokes and pets.

The above photo makes it very unclear as to whether enjoyed the interruption or not.

When we returned to New York on July 3, the apartment was quite hot. Goober was lucky to’ve had an extra water dish.

Goober is practicing for the Stray Cat Strut by hanging out with the trash.

Hold all of Goober’s calls. He’s in a meeting.