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The Compleat John Byrne’s Next Men Volume 2

Jordan | Uncategorized | Monday, August 29th, 2011


A few months back I read the first phone book sized collection of JBNM and yesterday I picked up the second one. Over 500 pages of lightning paced reversals and switcheroos later I’m here to tell you this is one of the greatest and most fun science fiction stories I’ve ever read.

In addition to the genuine satire about politics and early 1990s society, it is a ripping good yarn. With humor! And sex! And time travel! And Hellboy? And mutant powers that can turn women in Playboy models.

Please dig this stuff up and read it. I’m about to jump into (the current) Volume 3.

Eastbound and Down, Season 2, A

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Monday, August 29th, 2011


I know there are only, like, six or seven episodes, and they’re, like, twenty-five minutes each . . .but I do not know how the sustained vibe of just-about-to-pass-out-drunkenness can be maintained by the writers, directors, actors and editors. It’s something of a masterpiece.

What’s best about this show is that there aren’t that many BIG LAUGHS. It’s just one never ending collection of embarrassment and WTF.


Justice Society of America: The Bad Seed

Jordan | Cram it in Your Ear | Monday, August 29th, 2011


This is one of the dumbest things I’ve ever read in my life. I don’t care how much fun it is to stare at Power Girl. Avoid at all costs.

The Walking Dead TPB 2-3

Jordan | Cram it in Your Ear | Monday, August 29th, 2011


Everyone ploughs through the Walking Dead in a mad rush – I’ve been takin’ ‘er real slow.
It definitely has a sustained nightmare quality. And also a repetitive quality that exists in the fables of some Eastern religions as well as Cardassian literature. I like it.

Tales of the Green Lantern Corps Vol. 3

Jordan | Cram it in Your Ear | Monday, August 29th, 2011

Chp 2

This (relatively) recent repackage is really just the first seven or so issues of the post-Crisis GLC on Earth. It’s kinda John Stewart’s show, though Hal is there (and there are cutaways to Guy on Malthus) though the bulk of the stories have to do with. . . Ch’p! And his evil foe Dr. Ub’x (who has many alter egos, including Truk – a truck.)

It’s very silly and perhaps even childish. . .until Arisia goes through the puberty machine and puts the moves on Hal. Should DC put out a volume 4 I’ll definitely pick it up – not so sure I’ll be chasing down the single issues. (I say this now. . . .)

Colombiana (2011), Olivier Megaton, C

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Friday, August 26th, 2011


When the French do it, it’s somehow okay.
Please read my review of the entertainingly awful Colombiana at

Rio (2011), Carlos Saldhana, C

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Tuesday, August 23rd, 2011

Skews young, real young. And not kids in the Gifted and Talented program, either. This is real mass market bullshit for the common person’s illiterate kid. Which is a shame, because the design work on the birds is so fantastic (and so’s some of the music.)
I was happier when I only saw the trailer.

Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark (2011), Troy Nixey, B-

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Tuesday, August 23rd, 2011


Simple, enjoyable.
Read my full review at

Then listen to this:

The Black Power Mixtape 1967-1975 (2011), Goran Olsson, B+

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Tuesday, August 23rd, 2011


Essential viewing for modern American history buffs.
Recent unearthed footage that Swedish television took concerning the black power movement, it is 100% fascinating and watchable, but I don’t know if it serves a larger purpose other than “wow, look at this cool shit we found.” Still, as someone who’s interested, I was riveted.

The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993), Henry Selick, A-

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Tuesday, August 23rd, 2011


Here’s one I didn’t get when it first came out. I remember sitting there in the theaters with my arms folded. I now recognize it not just for its craftiness, but as a terrific salute to all things spooky. And great songs, too!

Swingers (1996), Doug Liman, A-

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Tuesday, August 23rd, 2011


For a movie that’s ostensibly about swinging’ dicks, it’s actually rather sweet. And compared to the recent spate of post-Knocked Up movies, actually rather clever, not so much reliant on shock.

The moment photographed above, Vince Vaughan’s “I’m the asshole in the place!” dance of bromantic celebration is (and I’m not just saying this) one of the most touching, truest moments on film. The rest of the movie is merely very good – but this moment is legendary.

Fright Night (1985), Tom Holland, B+

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Tuesday, August 23rd, 2011


Part of the reason I didn’t like the new Fright Night is because I foolishly went back and re-watched the first one.

Yeah, maybe that isn’t fair – and every movie should be judged in a vacuum – but, hey, I’m a human being, damn it!

Anyway, this has fun, rich characters, a nice slow build and, most importantly, Roddy McDowall.

Fright Night (2011), Craig Gillespie, C-

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Tuesday, August 23rd, 2011

I did not particularly care for the new Fright Night. You can (and should!) read my full review over at

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine: A Stitch in Time

Jordan | The Star Trek Project | Tuesday, August 23rd, 2011


I’m not going to read the “Season Eight” Deep Space Nine expansion novels. At least not this year. I can say, however, that this one (which is, unofficially, the first of two books in that continuing series) is quite good. Really.

I mean, think about it – what DS9 did best was present rich, full, fascinating characters, and Elim Garak was one of the best ones. So much of what made him interesting was his mysterious past and now it’s time to learn the whole story.

Yes, friends, its the Garak’s full backstory – everything you ever wanted to know about your favorite Cardassian tailor/intelligence operative. His childhood, schooling, early years with Obsidian Order and his eventual banishment to Terok Nor is all here – in surprisingly readable prose from . . .Andrew Robinson? The actor who played him? Hey, why not.

The framing device is a letter composed to Dr. Bashir from Cardassia Prime just after the end of the Dominion War, so if this was meant as a gateway drug to Season Eight, well, it just might have worked.

Miral (2010), Julian Schnabel, D

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Sunday, August 7th, 2011


I didn’t even have to get all up-in-arms about this movie from a political perspective – I can safely dismiss it on story terms. It is boring, distant and phony. At the 1 hr 17 min mark is the first time anything is uttered that isn’t a platitude. Even the poster is a head fake, hinting an intrigue that is absent in the movie.

I give this a “D” because I can’t give anything that has so much Alexander Seddig in it a failing grade. A surprisingly bad film from the usually top-notch J.S.

30 Minutes or Less (2011), Ruben Fleischer, B

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Sunday, August 7th, 2011


A simple, perhaps even a little stupid, movie elevated by talented performers like Eisenberg, Ansari, McBride, Swardson and Pena. There’s some good riffing in this one – please read my full review at

The Foot Fist Way (2006), Jody Hill, B+

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Sunday, August 7th, 2011


If you want to see the origins of Kenny Powers, look no further than Concorde Taekwondo in the local dipshit, fuckin’ strip mall.

If only all low budget, independent films were this amusing.

Rise of the Planet of the Apes (2011), Rupert Wyatt, A

Jordan | Jordan Hoffman's Movie Journal | Sunday, August 7th, 2011

Spectacular – and perhaps even more of a marvel because it is still good despite some really dumb parts.
Please read my full review over at (and then go see the movie for yourself.)

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